Friday, April 08, 2005


Dumbbutt is my brother. He has been since he was eight--I was eighteen. Somehow the name "Dumbbutt" came to replace Dimitri's Christian name. It probably happened after pointing to his nose and saying "ear" after an hour-long session of learning what his bodyparts were in English. Our pastor walked up to meet Dima at lunch one day, "And what's your name?" My little brother grinned through his cute Russian accent, "I'm Dumbbutt!" My mother covered her eyes and groaned.

He's sixteen now, a sophomore in high school, and we still call him Dumbbutt. When I was home over spring break, he pulled the drawstring from his athletic shorts over his head and walked around our sister Tatiana's room dancing and singing "I love dan-cing . . . oh yes I do . . . I love dan-cing . . . na-na-na-na-na-na." Tat and I couldn't stop laughing, and I snapped a photo of him with my camera phone and titled it, you guessed it, "Dumbbutt."

This morning I decided to change the wallpaper on my phone--Ben Folds needed a rest. I grinned when I saw Dimitri's picture. "Menu . . . Photo gallery . . . Assign pic . . . Wallpaper . . ." I waited a few seconds and the phone replied: "Dumbbutt Activated."

Dumbbutt activated. Yes, indeed. Reminds you just a smidge of the Wonder Twins, too, doesn't it?


Rick said...

i have a little brother. takes a bit more to get my dumbbutt activated. great story, though.

Esue said...

Shortly after birth,I was coined with the name "Buns", because, well, it's still obvious...I've got a big ass. There is only one man in the world who calls me godfather Phil. But now when he calls me that, he sounds more like a dirty old man than a Godfather using a term of endearment. I love your story!

DMor said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
DMor said...

Hey dork I got a blog, it's, by sis

Anonymous said...

softy has disallowed anonymous posts on his blog... he will have to make due without my sublte wit and sly charm.