Ah, Ben Folds... so amazing I don't yet have words. Maybe they'll come tomorrow.
Last night, I helped my brother survive an underwater seasnake attack. This was not just any seasnake, mind you. It was the Galapagal Terror Snake. The attack is still foggy (it must have been very traumatic), but I had just happened to bring the Galapagal Terror Snake locator map with me in my back pocket. The binding glows with the locating beacons of every known GTS, which is about 32. Only three of them, however, are known to live in this particular underwater region. And by precisely locating the snake that bit my brother, we were able to mentally telepath the antitoxin into his bloodstream. Amazing. Never before had the Galapagal Terror Snake locator map come in so handy, and never before had we discovered that we were mentally telapic. Mental telepathic. Mentapalathic.
Unfortunately for future underwater snake-bite disasters, the map self-destructed by rolling into a ball and screaming, "Enunciate!"
And then there was this beautiful man on tv on the research channel -- a beautiful, smart man. I didn't even mind so much when I realized he was lecturing on toe fungus. :)